Trump and kid / 2024
Fiction“The Robert” began to model himself after the president who single-handedly saved the country from itself.
For a kid his age, he watches more that his share of C-Span.
He doesn’t care about wonky issues but he likes to study powerful people. He’s especially impressed by how they call people names and use outrageous lies to humiliate them.
The boy kept his hair long so when he decided to sweep it across his forehead, all he needed was hairspray. At the same time, he began to pretend he didn’t hear kids when they called him Bobby.
I’m “The Robert,” he insisted. When a seventh-grader used his old name, he made up rumors that destroyed her. It felt good.
Strutting and bloviating – “everyone loves me” – he came to dominate his school.
As they did every Sunday, his family went to his grandparents. His aunts, uncles and cousins hooted with laughter when he launched into his Trump routine.
“Aunt Caroline’s a fat slob,” he announced as potatoes were passed. The Robert told his cousin she was a H-U-G-E loser. “Jason wimps out during gym.” He reproached his father for not having an advanced degree and taunted the housekeeper with a fake Guatemalan accent.
After dinner his grandmother invited him into the living room. She’s an adoring woman and each of her nine grandkids believe they’re her favorite.
When they were alone she pulled Bobby close and held him long enough for it to mean something. She took a step back to look at him, paused briefly and then she slapped him hard, but not as hard as she could have.