Fallen Angels, 22, Intruder

The minute Jane entered the apartment she knew someone had been there – Phoebe hides whenever strangers are around.

Unsettling things have been happening since indictments over the January insurrection have been handed down.

Dick receives emails from a friend who died years ago. Strange apps show up on their devices. Their BMW was jacked up on cinder blocks one morning.

Dick and Jane are likely to be subpoenaed as witnesses in the 1/6 trials.

They know things that could incriminate former executive branch insiders – including the former president – and certain members of Congress.

When Jane opened the refrigerator she realized where the warnings were coming from.

Only her former White House colleagues knew she had been rushed to GWU Hospital after eating Kung Pao chicken during a working lunch.

Front and center on the top shelf of her fridge, Jane found a jar of Smucker’s peanut butter with a Post-it that said “enjoy.”

Follow the travails of the Fallen Angels from the first episode.

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Fallen Angels, 21, Grandfather

“How much do you need?” Dick’s grandfather Doe asked.

Dick is facing the reality that his trust fund won’t be available until he reaches thirty.

The Does are flinty Granite State Yankees who believe youngsters should learn to fend for themselves until the age when an inherited fortune won’t spoil them.

“How is it a bright, young fella with a quarter-million dollar education doesn’t have a job?

“Don’t bother to answer, Richard. I know exactly how you fucked up your career.

”Tell you what, Grandson, I’m not going to lend you a penny. But I am going to outright give you that twenty five thousand – and you don’t have to pay back a cent of it – on one condition.”

“Anything, Grandfather.”

“You will never again text, tweet, post or get paid to claim the election was stolen.

“We really should see each more often, Richard. Could you send the nurse in on your way out?”

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Fallen Angels, 20, Jane Got Played

It wasn’t because Jane isn’t brilliant – she graduated one slot below the top of her class at UT Austin.

And it wasn’t because she’s naive – she trolled reality for the most corrupt president in modern history.

The reason Jane decided to accept the conspiracy theory project is because, for the first time in her life, she’s broke and doesn’t know where her next brunch is coming from.

Dick refused to touch the project and was appalled when Jane signed on.

Jane presented character-assassination takedowns targeting every RINO who voted to certify the election. “They were brilliant concepts,” she bragged to Dick, “and now those scumbags deny ever meeting me.”

“Did you actually expect to get paid by white-nationalists who feed lies to elderly Fox viewers?”

“Isn’t that what we did for four years?” Jane shot back.

“And we got paid for it.” her husband replied.

Jane announced she was going to take a shower.

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Fallen Angels, 19, Taylor Greene

The purpose of the Zoom meeting was to talk about creating conspiracy theories that could be fed to Newsmax and Fox.

Frankly, Dick and Jane had planned to leave conspiracy work behind after they left the White House (it didn’t play well at their class reunions).

Meanwhile their skills at bending reality have caught the attention of white nationalist groups.

No less than the rising, fund-raising superstar from Georgia’s Fourteenth asked for a Zoom. Dick and Jane agreed only because they need money.

“Y’all did great claiming the election was stolen” the congresswoman said “…pullin’ them talkin’ points right outta thin air.”

“I’ll pay top dollar for creativity like yours. We got some in-house ideas you could maybe help us fancy up.

”One is that COVID vaccines are linked to flesh-eating farts and the other is that Liz Cheney dates barnyard animals.”

Dick hit the mute button and turned to Jane.

“I’m not doing this.” he said.

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Fallen Angels, 18, Landlord and Car Wash

Solley was standing in front of Jane and Dick’s apartment, waiting for them to return from a run.

“Y’all folks noticed there be help-wanted signs up and down the block?” he asked.

Solley enjoys using street talk with certain of his renters.

“Only reason I bring it up is your rent be due two days ago.”

The man is a highly successful landlord in a neighborhood where collecting rent can be a struggle.

His major marketing advantage is that he doesn’t bother with credit scores, a fact that helped Dick and Jane get their lease.

“I’m one of them Rand Paul, Tom Cotton libertarians.” he said. “I don’t get cops and courts involved. If my renters don’t pay on time, I can get ‘em relocated in a matter of days. It’s a special courtesy I offer.”

“Give us a week, Solly.” Dick asked. “We’re closing in on a project that’ll straighten out our financial problems.”

“If that falls through,” Solly replied, pointing toward 18th NW, “my car wash is offering signing bonuses.”

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